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Stronghold 2 » Forums » The Sword and Buckler Inn » WEIGHTS AND MEASURES - Story Comment Thread
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Topic Subject:WEIGHTS AND MEASURES - Story Comment Thread
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 09-24-03 15:53 EST (US)         
WEIGHTS AND MEASURES

COMMENT THREAD

Please post your comments about WEIGHTS AND MEASURES in this thread and not in the story thread. THANK YOU!

Here is a link to the STORY THREAD.

[This message has been edited by Civis Romanus (edited 10-31-2003 @ 03:11 PM).]

AuthorReplies:
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 09-30-03 15:06 EST (US)     1 / 18       
Those of you who might be following the new story in SH might be confused as to its setting. Good. What is going to happen will be a surprise when it occurs but not so in retrospect.

Lady Arcola
SHH Seraph
posted 10-04-03 13:30 EST (US)     2 / 18       
Very nicely done Civis! I was wondering how you were going to blend the past and present.

..................
Seraph Lady Arcola
"I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." -Walter Winchell

~ BFME2 Heaven | Stronghold Heaven | Stronghold 2 Heaven~
..................
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 10-06-03 15:08 EST (US)     3 / 18       
Thanks, Lady A. I suspect some still don't know what to make of this story. I'm one of them.

Do you think there's any interest out there in a team written story? And by team written I mean more than just two people.

Micah Aragorn
Archer
posted 10-06-03 23:45 EST (US)     4 / 18       
There are excellent team writers in SH. But I know its hard to write when your looking forward to the next post that you (Civis) may be adding. As always I am interested in a team story. Possibly something during Charlemagne's time?
Lady Arcola
SHH Seraph
posted 10-07-03 00:27 EST (US)     5 / 18       
Micah Aragorn is right we have some wonderful writers in SHH
like Jay, Gill, and PC Dania and I am sure there is a lot more I have not met as I do not get out of SHH that much. What time frame were you hinting at Civis? this story or another one?

..................
Seraph Lady Arcola
"I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." -Walter Winchell

~ BFME2 Heaven | Stronghold Heaven | Stronghold 2 Heaven~
..................
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 10-07-03 15:15 EST (US)     6 / 18       
This current story will not last as long as THE HUMAN TOUCH nor will it be as complex. I anticipate it being over by the end of October. We can begin a team written story any time you want to even if it is being written in parallel to WEIGHTS AND MEASURES.

I would prefer the role of supplementing and sparking a new team written story, contributing in the background and not dominating the plot if at all possible. I think it can be more fun for everyone that way. (And I wouldn't mind the vacation, if you know what I mean )

So... Shall I put out a "Call For Authors" post just to see what happens?

Lady Arcola
SHH Seraph
posted 10-07-03 19:14 EST (US)     7 / 18       
Would you like to go to France again and maybe write the begining story for Crusade of the Heart? We could maybe cover from Charlemagne to Eleanor of Aquitaine?

..................
Seraph Lady Arcola
"I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." -Walter Winchell

~ BFME2 Heaven | Stronghold Heaven | Stronghold 2 Heaven~
..................
Micah Aragorn
Archer
posted 10-08-03 02:09 EST (US)     8 / 18       
A "Call for Authors" would definately be in order. While doing some fun research on Charlemagne's era I noticed that the tales spun from and about he and his relatives reached mythical proportions. Stories show adventure, myth, romance and deceit. Would this interest anyone?
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 10-22-03 11:59 EST (US)     9 / 18       
Readers: There will be some delays in posting to this story as I have a seasonal offering to make and may have some difficulty doing both at the same time. Please bear with me. I guarantee WEIGHTS AND MEASURES will be resumed and concluded though it may be later than I anticipated.
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 11-05-03 20:23 EST (US)     10 / 18       
Those of you following this story, I am taking a moment to remind you to check for multiple posts to the story in a single day. At times I will post more than once due to schedule or other reasons. I prefer to multiple post instead of adding through edit because it permits me access to previous posts at the same time I am writing new material. It helps me to avoid "continuity" errors. Usually.

I hope you are finding the story interesting and entertaining.

Lady Arcola
SHH Seraph
posted 11-05-03 23:02 EST (US)     11 / 18       
I'm reading every evening Sire
Kaidonni
Archer
posted 11-14-03 06:17 EST (US)     12 / 18       
Yo. Er, there was that new story written thing posted, you know, for the Charlmagne thing, the one you invited me to. Well, I'm kinda confused...what is happening about that story? Is it still being prepared? Can't wait to start it...

(\_/)
(X.x)---------
()> <()
\/\/\/\/\/\
\/\/\/\/\/\/\
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\This is Bunny roasting on an open fire. Yummy!
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 11-14-03 12:28 EST (US)     13 / 18       
Hello Kaidonni:

We're part time writers of all ages. Some of us have classes that are a priority. Others among us care for families; and others have full time jobs and careers. Many of us have combinations of all these intervening factors. As enthusiastic as we all are about creative writing, we try to take a measured approach to each project and that sometimes takes a little time.

This particular discussion thread is tied to the story I'm writing solo titled WEIGHTS AND MEASURES. As I'm writing this story by myself it does take up a large piece of my free time so I have chosen to wait until this weekend to start doing the basics on our "Charlemagne" story. Hang in there and you will see the threads appear obviously signalling the project is underway.

Do keep in mind we will have a few simple rules to keep ourselves organized. First and foremost is to post (as you are trying to do) discussions among the writers in the Discussion Thread and not in the story thread itself. For the Charlemagne story, you can use the "Call For Writers - New Story" thread which I've linked to this post for you. When the new team written story is launched, a discussion thread for that story will be launched at the same time.

As I said before, welcome to Stronghold Heaven and our circle of writers.

[This message has been edited by Civis Romanus (edited 11-14-2003 @ 12:32 PM).]

Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 11-18-03 20:45 EST (US)     14 / 18       
As you can tell, the story was completed last Sunday. It's reader feedback time. If you would, kindly take a moment and offer some constructive criticism of this story. I always take into consideration what is said and try to integrate it into my follow on story writing efforts. Whether complements, suggestions for improvement or both, all comments are welcome and eagerly awaited.

Thanks for reading WEIGHTS AND MEASURES.

TealWanderERII
Archer
posted 11-19-03 05:20 EST (US)     15 / 18       
Well you asked for it !!

Bravo Sire !
A masterful performance (of course)expecting nothing less

I quite liked the blending of modern and ancient, I was wondering how you would make it all tie together and was not disappointed by your transitions.

My only minor quibble...
I found that you tendeded to lean on (emphasis) the "weights and measures" theme a little to stongly at points in the story.
My suggestion would be to tone it down a little...
Unless your point was to beat it into the reader's mind ?

Duck's the pell arm as it comes swinging bye again...

With Respect !!!
Bravo Sire !!

Later

TealWanderER II
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 11-19-03 11:57 EST (US)     16 / 18       
Greetings TealWanderERII:

You're right. When I reviewed the final story after posting the conclusion I came to exactly the same conclusion. I overworked the theme.

In THE HUMAN TOUCH I used the title tie-in, I think, twice. The first use was in the very beginning in the early part of the story when the jester was performing for the children; and I used it again at the very end of the story. That seemed to work quite well.

In THE LION AND THE HAWKS in CB Heaven I used a direct tie-in only once when Alexander addressed his Egyptian spies as his "hawks" and charged them with their mission against the Persian "lion." However, I allowed Alexander to refer to them as "my hawks" on a few other occasions.

I overdid it in WEIGHTS AND MEASURES. If I edit the story for an attempt at publication, I will have to do two specific edits. The first will be to reduce the references to "weights and measures" and the second will be to edit out all of the song lyrics I posted. As the story is presently constructed, it is no different than the product of a hobby. If I should commercialize it, then I will have to adjust the text to existing copyright laws.

Lady Arcola
SHH Seraph
posted 11-19-03 13:39 EST (US)     17 / 18       
I Loved it Civis! I wondered at Lancasters hint to the past and maybe a small insight may have quelled my wondering. LOL but it may have been what you intended, causing the reader to ponder the last statement on their own. Bravo!!! Bravo!!!
Civis Romanus
Earl
posted 11-19-03 15:32 EST (US)     18 / 18       
Thanks Lady A. Yes, it was my intention to leave the reader wondering about the hint to the past, in effect adding just a little touch of mystery about Lancaster at the very end.

Call it a "Civis" twist to the classic "Wizard of Oz" ending as opposed to the ending where the prime character discovers an artifact in his pocket that could only have come from the past, which supposedly was a subconscious rather than physical experience. I threw out the latter plot twist because it is so trite and overused. Instead I used a more knotted "Oz" twist leaving the reader wondering if "Dorothy" went to Oz or did the "wizard" in WEIGHTS AND MEASURES bring the equivalent of Oz to Dorothy.

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