Hello kind Lords and Ladies, I invite you to tour The Grand Hilltop Castle! The builders, after observing the mindless hordes of would-be designers constructing naught but large unattractive walls and claiming them unbreakable castles, accepted that their motley structure would be sieged and ultimately destroyed. Thus they created a structure that was both defensible and sightly and have garrisoned it with the shamed would-be creators who sought to pose as strategists. So come one, come all, tour The Grand Hilltop Castle! Enjoy the various amenities such as STAIRS! GATE HOUSES! OIL POTS! A DRAWBRIDGE! KILLING PITS! and much more! The kind staff will be happy to facilitate all of your mindless slaughtering needs, just ask nicely --- with an arrow or blade. Hopefully this brief jaunt to our fine establishment will amuse and challenge you for five minutes or so. Have a nice day!