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Great wall of Elmino

Author File Description
God Avo
File Details
Map Size: 400x400 (Large)
Difficulty: Hard
This is my 4th map submitted, although one of them was just a very bad siege ^^
There is no story in-game, sorry for that. But there is a story in the .zip and the story is here (most of which I got carried away with :D)..

The great wall Elmino.
You were appointed duke by the king, which of whom you had paid the ransom money for earlier this year.
The king has need of your assistance, the people of the continent of Elmino had need of the kings help in defence of their lands against Duc Volpe's troops and prowling wolves are plauging their vilages and mountains. The great wall of Elmino is their last chance of survival and they need it garrisoned with great heed.

Chapter 1.
" Duke! I have assigned a scribe to you, he will inform you of important matters you must attend to. But the people of Elmino will not help you, they have lost enough civilians as it is, so I will send with you a cart of weapons and food and some needed supplies. The journey shouldn't take too long if you leave now, the boat should depart when you are settled in to it. I bid thee luck, farewell." The king ordered one of his guards to escort me out of the castle throne room and into the street, where which awaited me was a cart full of supplies and a person dressed in a overhead robe with a book in his left arm.
" Here is your company, this cart will be able to hold alot more supplies, but the king needs to defend his kingdom too! Now, make haste to the docks where a boat awaits you." The guard said, slightly yawning.
" Yawning is rude you know, especially infront of a duke." You pointed out to the guard.
" Sorry, my lord. It won't happen again."
" That's because I won't ever be seeing the king again, this mission is a death awaiting me." You mumbled, in a very long breath.
" Sorry liege? I didn't quite get that."
" Nevermind, just talking to myself.. haven't you got more important duties to be attending to?" You sighed, looking down then sharply up.
" Oh right, yes my lord. Farewell."
" Sire, are you ready to leave for the boat?" The scribe asked.
" Yes, but to be sen't against Duc Volpe's troops, it isn't a very nice feeling," You started to walk down the steps leading onto the road, and spoke to your scribe, " but first I wish to tell my sister about this, she lives along the path we are going."
" Yes sire, as you wish."

The scribe gathered an oxen to hull the cart along, and the oxen struggled terribly so the scribe got another one to go along side the other oxen. The oxen were looking more at eachother than they were the road, but they still took the right turns and roads.
" Here we are, my sisters house. Before I forget to ask, what's your name, scribe?" You looked at the house, before turning to your scribe.
"Thomas Hardwood, but you can call be Tom for short, sire."
"Thank you, I will remember your name, Tom. I will speak to my sister along, if I may." You walk up to the door, regardless if Tom says no and knock.

Chapter 2.
The door opens and reveals a beautiful face.
" Brother! You've returned!" You hugged your sister for a long time. "Well, a cape and shiny armor, what posistion are you now? A bachelor?" Your sister always used to ask alot of questions, but surprisingly this wasn't anywhere as near as much as she normally does, yet.
" No, hehe. I'm a duke!" You said with much joy.
" No way, your joking right? I bet your still a squire, arn't you? Or are you a high-knight?" The questions were going to keep on coming, untill your scribe walked up and moved part of your cape that folded over your shoulder.
" This is a sign of a duke, madam. The cresent with two foldings of a triangle at either end of this mark shows that this armor belongs to a duke and is kept safe guarded." Tom interupted your sisters answers.
Your scribe then backed away from you, mouthing the words "sorry, sire!".
Your siter looked at Tom briefly a few times, cracking a small smile whilst looking at the mark, and then jumped like a kangaroo.
" Oh wow! I've never been this close to a duke before, a knight yes, but it was closer than this... if you know what I mean!" Your sister started to giggle, you looked at her with a shocked expression on your face whilst Tom turned his back to her starting to laugh.
" Well that was truly educationly, sister.. uhm, well. Oh, here take this, i'm leaving again for harlot- oh, uhm.. sorry I ment Harior, the bed at the docks, uhm boat, sorry. I've really got to go, farewell!" You leap backwards down the steps of your sisters door way.
" Oh come on, i'm grown up.. you must of jumped into the bed of a woman before, hehe." You turned to your sister, mouth dropped, leaning forward, arms hanging by your sides... cheeks glowing bright red, eyebrows lowered and you started to hear Tom, sitting in the cart, laughing his heart out.
" Well, if you must know, yes I have. And it was not just for fun, it was a full term relationship, untill she had an affair and I ordered her executed. I wouldn't miss her anyway." You then woke up Tom from his fits of laughter, and said farewell to your sister.

Chapter 3.
You left the road that your sister lived along. Tom was still giggling, and it was really starting to annoy you.
" Tom for heaven's sake, stop laughing!" You said in a loud, partialy angry tone of voice.
" Sorry, sire! It was just so funny though! Oh, old times for me." Tom said, looking up to the sky.
" What do you mean?" You said, suspiciously.
" Well, I was once a knight, got drunk by a lady and woke up in someone elses bed!" You sighed and then looked at Tom.
" And they lived near a Inn too, with steps leading to their door, and two, carved windows without glass, in a small wattle and daub house.. Oh my god! I slept with your sister! Oh sorry sire, I am so sorry, please don't hurt me! I didn't know untill today! Oh sire, I'm sorry!" Tom claimed, jumping into the back of the cart, hitting his arm on a stone brick, "Ow!".
" Wait, calm down! I said calm down" You said, shouting into the cart, people staring at you. They must of thought your were going crazy or something.
" Ok, sorry sire! Please don't hurt me! Please!"
You lean't against the wooden structure of the cart, speaking, when you noticed your sister running down the street.
" Brother!"
" Sister!"
" Sister?" Tom said, looking out of the cart.
" Oh I know where I've seen you before!" Your sister exclaimed.
" Me too! I was once a knight!"
" I got you drunk, didn't I?"
" Yes!" Tom then turned to you. Your face was a mixture of a bashed stone and surprise, "Oh my lord, it is true! I did climb into your sisters bed!"

You then ran to Tom and grabbed him by the neck and pushed him against the cart's cloth, then you dropped him, making sure he didn't fall.
" I'm sorry sire, I beg of you to not hurt me and forgive my sinfulness!" Tom sat there, crying.
" Brother, if you hurt this man then I will report this to the king and I will never speak to you again!" You backed away from Tom, leaving your sister to sit by him, cuddling him as you look away and say;
" Sorry Tom, I just don't want my little sister to be harmed in any way, she's still only sixteen... I want her to be carefull and not to throw her life away." You turned to Tom, offering him your hand. He takes your hand and pulls himself up, along with your sister, adding weight onto your hand. You and Tom then shake hands and say sorry.

Your sister then tells you that she must be getting home, she has alot of work to do at the inn, serving drinks.
You then walk to the boat without any more interuptions.

Chapter 4.
" Sire, the boat is ready to leave. Shall we depart now?" Tom said, hastily sitting down.
" Yes, I will inform them, you stay here and rest." You then walk into the control and bridge room, from which you are assaulted by three assassins from behind, you were shocked that they didn't kill you but it seemed as though their missions were to capture you, because they had no weapons on them.
The first assassin grabbed you by the neck and held your mouth, then one of the other assassins kicked your legs forward and the third assassin grabbed your legs and held them in the air, but fortunately for you you had a small surviveal knife by your wrists, and pulled it out and stabbed the assassin grabbing your legs in the ribs bringing the assassin holding your mouth to bend over, you then turned over and cut open his leg and pushed him onto the floor as you almost amputated his right foot, Tom came rushing in because of the noise and jumped back abit and pulled out a small blade from his belt and threw it at the last assassin, striking him through the left forearm, and then the assassin passed out for the blade that was thrown at him was poison coated. You managed to grab the assassin with the half ripped foot and pulled him towards you as he was being peirced by the tip of your sword which was mean't to be by your legs, but was turned in a 180 degrees angle to point upwards because it was laying on the floor, you then grabbed your sword with your other hand and pulled it away from it's holder and lunged your sword into the stomach, of the assassin, the other of which had escaped and jumped into the sea to drown and die.

" Sire! Are you ok? I had not been in here I was only stocking the supplies and putting the oxen into a barn." The ship was huge.
" Yes, I think so.. my face hurts, but i'm fine. How about you?"
" I'm ok, I will search through this body to see if I can find anything."
" I'll search the other one, it's a shame that the other one escaped and threw himself overboard because any one of these could of been the ring leader." You sighed and looked at the window but nothing was there.
" Sire! Look at this! It looks like a signet brooch of a faction, it resembles a wolf. Sire, this could mean that Duc Volpe knew we were gonna come! But how?" Tom took a moment to think, but you interupted.
" That is a posibility that we will have to rule out, there is no wa-" A scream for help came from the lever room of the bridge, you open up the door and the ship captain is there tied up by string to a pipe, and a cut rope around his neck with teeth marks and gnashing holes in it.
" You must be the two i'm shipping off to Elmino? Yes? Well even if not, please untie me! My mouth is killing me aswell!" Tom rushes in to untie him and gives him some water.
" Sail us now, captain. We have no time to spare!" You said and walked into the passenger room with Tom.

Chapter 5.
The journey to Elmino by sea was safe, and so was the walk to the great wall. Only a few wolves appeared but some outlaws had killed them off for you, then greeted you and ran back into the woods.
You were alowed through the gate and the guard there then walked through the gate to the south west and kept on walking untill you couldn't see him anymore.
The lands were now yours to defend, and defend them well.

I would suggest playing this map on easy mode first for decent players normal/hard for pros.
This is a very long map (30+ years almost, or more!)

You will need to act fast to build an army and eradicate the wolfs as they would just kill off your archers and crossbowman :p So you need to strike a balance between melee troops and ranged troops otherwise you will find this extremely hard

I spen't alot of time on this, and not so much on the story. I hope that the story makes you laugh in some bits aswell ^^
Please comment/rate ^^
AuthorComments & Reviews   ( All | Comments Only | Reviews Only )
FroobaChoob Hmm Looks Nice On minimap. Will Download And Play

Oh And Maybe I Will read A Story Like that Sometime ;D
I had great fun playing this one :-) And thanks for allowing the player to place his own keep. That always adds another dimension for me :-)))

Eric von Golf
Map Design4.0
Good map! Good fun! I definitely recommend you download and play it. Overall 3.4

Playability 4
I always enjoy the option of where to place my keep! The game played well. The wolves appeared from some unusual places but that just made things more exciting. The layout of the map allowed for some enjoyable defensive options. Everything was available so I could throw the book at the enemy. Subjectively, I liked not having to sweat too much (see balance below) but others may not feel the same way.

Balance 3
I played on hard and won comfortably. So average here. The hefty target of 75% blessed (on hard) did help consume stone and space. I had many churches.

Creativity 4
The part I liked best was the roads. Although slightly coarse/jagged in close-up they looked great in zoomed out mode and really added to the attractiveness of the mini-map. Some parts of the great wall were specially raised. Although there was nothing outstandingly original it was pretty well laid out. The story may have had some originality in it somewhere… ;-) see below. There was a nice little castle in the corner but it seemed to perform no function apart from containing the “good things”. (4 may be slightly generous here but see Story below)

Map Design 4
Two main good points: 1) The Great Wall. Nice use of buried wall and raised surrounding ground lined with rocks causing the AI to focus on the middle. 2) The water feature between the two signposts had a further channelling effect on the AI sending the troops from the right hand signpost past one of the towers. However, there are not too many rivers that flow back on themselves like that. Maybe it could have been a lake instead? On the minus side: The resources, although well placed, were too plentiful (apart from wood) and this affected the balance.

Story/Instructions 2
Famine and feast! There was no story in game. There was a long story on the site and in an RTF file in the zip. I imagine quite a bit of effort went into writing it. (As I was writing this review I read it all.) However, finding anything relevant to game play in the story was difficult. (I could only find one thing: the forewarning of the enemy that you had set sail.)
Some suggestions:
Cut the ripping yarn of the journey to the great wall, but keep it and put it into a separate file about the journey including it in the zip. The site needs a story including the reason for the mission and any history behind the expected situation the player will meet at the Great Wall (including a summary of anything significant that happens on the journey). Make it easier for the player reading the site to skip to the hints for play (if you are going to give any). The game should have a boiled down version of what goes on the site. If it is not possible to succeed without reading more then the game should have a reference in it to whatever else contains the vital information. Also I think it should be Normal difficulty rating.
God Avo, I hope any criticism here does not seem too harsh (It is not meant to be :-). Read again my introductory sentence. If you do make some changes to the story let me know and I will amend this review.
(2 might be a bit severe here but this is balanced by Creativity above)

Good looking map with some nice features on it. Good fun to play! To the author I say, “Thanks for a good fun game” :-)

Eric the Golf

[Edited on 08/01/06 @ 06:10 PM]

God Avo
File Author
Thanks for your review, Eric.. really, thank you :)
Yeah the story did tend to focus mainly on the before and not so much on the actually setting of the great wall.. in my next map I will definately improve on my storywriting so it gets to the point quickly ;)
Oh and the mountain river rush wasn't ment to look as if it flows back on itself, it was ment to flow from the mountain trails into the basin at the bottom ;)

You must be better at this map/nearly all of my maps because I couldn't finish this one on normal mode :p And the other map (edge of a mountain) took me almost all of my troops to get right :p

Again, thank you for your review.. I look forward to seeing some more of your maps ;) Psst! Make an defence map! :p
Map Design5.0
Playability: 5
This map is fun to play and doesnt have any problems with the invasions, animals, or events. I played this map with different keep placements, and it played fine everytime.

Balance: 5
I gave this a 5 because it has wolves and they are balanced well so its worth a five. At the beginning you better get some defenders up or the wovles will get you. The invasions are a little wimpy but for the average player its perfect.

Creativity: 4
Hey its a big wall. But more than that, it has well done and OUT OF THE WAY eyecandy and unique swamp work. The landscape is open in the middle giving good fields of fire against the marching enemy.

Map Design: 5
The enemy attack the wall first, unless you put your keep on the signpost side. This requires planning, and keeping close to the iron and stone didnt prove to be the best starting location for me. I liked by the wall but close to the corner compound.

Story/Instructions: 4
Suitable wordsmithing for a 4 in my book.

Additional Comments:
Playing Level: 5000
Troops Lost 16% 8400
2959 gold extra : 2959
Total Score 16359
God Avo
File Author
Wow, a great review from you Lollard.. thank you :D I wasn't expecting such a high score..

Look out for my map packs coming soon of the lands of Stirn!

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