This is the beginig of a six chapter story about the Dorf civilization:
The Dorf strated out as a peaseful tribe on the border of what is tooday Bulgaria.In the Pirin mountain.The people learned to get the most out of nature:food,good hideouts and other supplies.The mountain was plentiful.Times were good and the Dorf prospered.Their King-Samuel was a wise and powerful man.He was a briliant strategist and an excelent leader.He ruled well over 30 years.Everyone was happy.
July 12 1069.
This was a dark date.One of the crusades was crushed and the remaining knights were returning to Italy.The leader of the remaining crusade-A.Mickery,was badly hurt.His soul was leaving him,there was nothing that could be done to help him.Mickery's soldiers began to go mad.They had lost the battle and now they could lose the leader.But on that same date a stranger ran into the knights.I still wonder who that person was a traitor or mabye a spy.This man told the exhausted men about Shepts Ankh my city.At that time Shepts Ankh was at its peak.No other town could have been more advanced.......Its true that Shepts was a great city but it laked one thing-soldiers.The people had never been in war with someone because the city was pretty well hidden in the mountains.Our glorius capitol was constructed on a land bombarded by small asteroids.One of these asteroids oppened a hole from which a spring errupted.This was no ordinary spring.It was full of calcium a chemical that few people knew.Even the citizens on Shepts didn't knew what this was,but my grandfather told me long ago.He was a chemits.And whenever someone from Shepts was ill he went to the spring and started to scrub water over his body.I don't believe that the water did anything but the people were ecouraged and with lifted spirits they usually began to heal.But i might be wrong.This water is really amazing.Who knows it might really help a bit.
So the foolish Mickery believed that this water could cure him.And with what was left of his army he began to attack the outposts that lead to the city.Eventually he battled his way to the city itself Shepts Ankh.....The city is well fortified and has plenty of archers.Other than that its very weak and i don't think it can hold back the siege.
Its your job now to defend the city and crush the crusade for good.Because if you fail than we all die.The end is ready to be written!
Yours truly Morbid Angel
P.S. Ive just updated a map.Atougher and more interesting one.There were a few faults.If someone can please rate it and tell me what they think of the overall balance.
Playability: 4
There's alot of soldiers to move around and control. You have to put them yourself into position. There's no bugs here, the mountains have ensured that the wall has to go down for them to pass. There are many archers, and the many flying arrows gives an intensifying feeling in the battle.
Balance: 3
You wanted comments on the balance... and its not very good to be honest. Its a generous 3 I score here. I had a huge army left, and the enemy hadn't even breached the last wall. Could use some work here, and in future maps you should playtest your maps alot.
Creativity: 4
I like the castle design, its very creative. And the story too, is a unique one which also counts as creative. The stone quarries were also a nice ad to the map, so its a strong 4!
Map Design: 4
Its really just a basic terraing I think. It needs more dirt, bushes, stone and rocks for it to look more realistic. Maybe a river too.
And generally the stone and iron on the map is placed very badly and doesn't look realistic. I think there are 'spotlight on design' articles about terraining on the Main Site.
This is a generous 4.
Story/Instructions: 3
Its a solid story, and a good one. But it has countless spelling errors, which drags down the overall score. You should train your writing skills, but it's not too bad. Its a strong 3 scoring.
Additional Comments:
I like this map, but what it needs is not a huge improvement in one thing, but rather, small changes on every aspect. But I want to see more from you in the future. =)